Now most schools are rounding off their academic session and teachers
are busy working on report cards. Your child’s report card may not meet
your expectations. You know your child is capable of more, he/she may be
intelligent but the grade doesn’t correspond with your perception of
him/her. In this case, it’s tempting to blow a gasket, withhold
privileges, and expect more from your child, especially when you know
some of his/her peers who performed excellently.
Don’t take it too far, you need to be softer; more strategic approach may yield better results. First, you need to understand why your child’s report card isn’t studded with A’s. Then you can work out a plan with your child to get back on track. To do this, you need to talk to your child and your child’s teacher. And you might need to take a look at yourself, making sure you are setting realistic expectations.
Talk With Your Child
When things go wrong, the first person to talk with is your child because he/she is directly involved in the situation. You need to let him or her feel that you can trust his/her opinion about reasons for the poor grades. When you talk with your child about his/her report card, see if your child has a realistic view of the situation. For example, your child may think he/she occasionally fails to turn in a homework assignment. But his teacher’s grade book might reveal a consistent pattern of neglecting his work. Your child may also feel that s/he needs assistance with home work and reinforcement of what was taught at school.
Also, your child may think that s/he understands Mathematics because she has always been strong in that subject. But as Maths becomes increasingly abstract, some kids struggle. Your teacher can help you and your child face reality if necessary.
Often, lower-than-expected grades reflect a more challenging curriculum. Science can get difficult for some kids when memorization and lab work are involved. Languages become tougher when teachers start expecting students to infer from their text and delve deeper into topics in their writing. When the curriculum gets harder, your child will need to work harder just to maintain his/her grades. This can be a hard fact to face. The good news is that as some subjects get harder for your child, other subjects may get easier as his/her academic strengths emerge.
It’s also possible that your child has an especially hard teacher. If your child’s teacher is tough but fair, try to see it as a blessing even if it means a lower grade. Kids often learn more from tough teachers and tend to look back on them fondly.
Talk With the Teacher
As a parent, you need to investigate any grade lower than a B. If the report card does not detail the reasons for the lower grade, ask the teacher. Does your child not understand the concepts? Or is s/he not turning in homework? Did s/he barely miss the cut-off for a higher grade? Or does the grade represent a higher mark than what s/he earned? (Some teachers are generous; also some school proprietors in Nigeria make it compulsory for their teachers to increase the grades of some students unnecessarily).
One of the hardest things to hear is that your child seems to be trying his/her best but is still just getting average grades. Parents should keep in mind that a stretch of average academic performance does not mean their child will always perform at that level or that s/he will be limited in life. A good teacher will help parents understand the reasons their child earned certain grades so parents can respond appropriately.
Talk to Yourself
Before stressing out over an inconsistent report card, consider whether the grades reflect your child’s strengths. If your child gets A’s and B’s in most subjects and a C in one subject, it might not be a big deal, as long as your child is making progress.
Don’t take it too far, you need to be softer; more strategic approach may yield better results. First, you need to understand why your child’s report card isn’t studded with A’s. Then you can work out a plan with your child to get back on track. To do this, you need to talk to your child and your child’s teacher. And you might need to take a look at yourself, making sure you are setting realistic expectations.
Talk With Your Child
When things go wrong, the first person to talk with is your child because he/she is directly involved in the situation. You need to let him or her feel that you can trust his/her opinion about reasons for the poor grades. When you talk with your child about his/her report card, see if your child has a realistic view of the situation. For example, your child may think he/she occasionally fails to turn in a homework assignment. But his teacher’s grade book might reveal a consistent pattern of neglecting his work. Your child may also feel that s/he needs assistance with home work and reinforcement of what was taught at school.
Also, your child may think that s/he understands Mathematics because she has always been strong in that subject. But as Maths becomes increasingly abstract, some kids struggle. Your teacher can help you and your child face reality if necessary.
Often, lower-than-expected grades reflect a more challenging curriculum. Science can get difficult for some kids when memorization and lab work are involved. Languages become tougher when teachers start expecting students to infer from their text and delve deeper into topics in their writing. When the curriculum gets harder, your child will need to work harder just to maintain his/her grades. This can be a hard fact to face. The good news is that as some subjects get harder for your child, other subjects may get easier as his/her academic strengths emerge.
It’s also possible that your child has an especially hard teacher. If your child’s teacher is tough but fair, try to see it as a blessing even if it means a lower grade. Kids often learn more from tough teachers and tend to look back on them fondly.
Talk With the Teacher
As a parent, you need to investigate any grade lower than a B. If the report card does not detail the reasons for the lower grade, ask the teacher. Does your child not understand the concepts? Or is s/he not turning in homework? Did s/he barely miss the cut-off for a higher grade? Or does the grade represent a higher mark than what s/he earned? (Some teachers are generous; also some school proprietors in Nigeria make it compulsory for their teachers to increase the grades of some students unnecessarily).
One of the hardest things to hear is that your child seems to be trying his/her best but is still just getting average grades. Parents should keep in mind that a stretch of average academic performance does not mean their child will always perform at that level or that s/he will be limited in life. A good teacher will help parents understand the reasons their child earned certain grades so parents can respond appropriately.
Talk to Yourself
Before stressing out over an inconsistent report card, consider whether the grades reflect your child’s strengths. If your child gets A’s and B’s in most subjects and a C in one subject, it might not be a big deal, as long as your child is making progress.
Many teachers express
concern that their stressed-out students believe they must get an A in
every subject to please their parents. For a small number of gifted
students, a perfect report card is attainable. But for most students,
the idea of being a lifelong straight-A student is unrealistic.
Pupils who are obsessed with perfect grades may develop anxiety, neglect their friends and family, be hostile and envious of the pupils who perform excellently and at the end, they may develop unhealthy habits like staying up all night and depending on caffeine. They may be tempted to cheat in order to maintain their perfect record. Or they may melt down at the sight of a B-plus. Avoid this scenario by setting realistic expectations for your child, praising the child when s/he does well, and offering to help when s/he doesn’t.
If you and your child are stressing out about grades, remember that they’re just letters and numbers. The most important thing is that your child is learning. If s/he’s progressing, that’s good. It’s possible that when you dig deep into the reasons behind your child’s mediocre or poor report card, you may find out s/he simply didn’t apply himself/herself and do the work. If that’s the case, withdrawing privileges and letting him/her know you’re disappointed might be all that’s necessary to turn things around.
Remember, never beat or scold a child for poor grades, there can always be rooms for improvement. Encourage your child to do better. You may also need to consider getting your child a reliable home tutor during this long holiday.
Pupils who are obsessed with perfect grades may develop anxiety, neglect their friends and family, be hostile and envious of the pupils who perform excellently and at the end, they may develop unhealthy habits like staying up all night and depending on caffeine. They may be tempted to cheat in order to maintain their perfect record. Or they may melt down at the sight of a B-plus. Avoid this scenario by setting realistic expectations for your child, praising the child when s/he does well, and offering to help when s/he doesn’t.
If you and your child are stressing out about grades, remember that they’re just letters and numbers. The most important thing is that your child is learning. If s/he’s progressing, that’s good. It’s possible that when you dig deep into the reasons behind your child’s mediocre or poor report card, you may find out s/he simply didn’t apply himself/herself and do the work. If that’s the case, withdrawing privileges and letting him/her know you’re disappointed might be all that’s necessary to turn things around.
Remember, never beat or scold a child for poor grades, there can always be rooms for improvement. Encourage your child to do better. You may also need to consider getting your child a reliable home tutor during this long holiday.
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